Is It Anxiety or OCD? Understanding Overthinking Artwork

Hidden in Plain Sight - ADHD, ASD, and OCD - The Often Missed Diagnoses Driving Overthinking, People Pleasing, Perfectionism, Self-Doubt, and Burnout

Let's see if this fits for you. You’re overwhelmed and tired, mentally, emotionally, maybe even physically. You overthink everything, feel like you're never doing enough, and constantly worry about what others think. You're often stuck in cycles of procrastination, perfectionism, or people-pleasing. Social situations can feel draining, and even rest doesn’t feel restful.

You’re the one who holds it together. You care deeply and try so hard to be good and helpful, while quietly unraveling inside. You get things done, but you never feel done. You never feel rested. You never feel right.

You find yourself endlessly scrolling, withdrawing from others, or struggling to feel motivated. If this sounds familiar, you’re not broken, and you’re not alone. You’ve just been hidden in plain sight.

Hidden in Plain Sight is a podcast for people-pleasing, perfectionistic, over-giving women who can't seem to find relief. Hosted by psychologist Dr. Lauren Schaefer, this show explores the often-missed diagnoses behind lifelong anxiety, burnout, and shame in women who’ve spent years masking often-missed diagnoses that are often labeled as "just anxiety." This is a podcast for the women who’ve been called too sensitive, too anxious, too intense, or too much, when really, they’ve just been misunderstood.

We’ll talk about the perfectionism you've developed to hide your ADHD. Obsessive-compulsive personality traits that were mistaken for a “strong work ethic.” Autism that’s camouflaged by emotional intelligence, people pleasing, and hypervigilant masking.

Here you’ll find language for your exhaustion, compassion for your coping, and a mirror that finally reflects the truth: You were never too much. You were just unseen. This is a place to unmask, unravel, and understand the real reasons it’s always felt harder than it looked.

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Hidden in Plain Sight - ADHD, ASD, and OCD - The Often Missed Diagnoses Driving Overthinking, People Pleasing, Perfectionism, Self-Doubt, and Burnout

Is It Anxiety or OCD? Understanding Overthinking

October 27, 2025 • Dr. Lauren Schaefer • Season 1 • Episode 5

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If you’ve ever found yourself thinking and thinking and thinking, turning a situation over in your mind like a Rubik’s cube, trying to find the right feeling, the right explanation, the right evidence that you’re safe or good or okay—this episode is for you.

Today on the podcast, we’re exploring one of the more confusing overlaps in mental health: the difference between anxiety and OCD, especially when it’s fueled by attachment wounds, a hyperactive mind, perfectionism, and a deeply wired need to feel “good enough” in your relationships.

This isn’t your typical diagnostic breakdown. Instead, we’re gently unpacking the function of your thoughts, because in many cases, what looks like anxiety is actually mental compulsions.

And when your nervous system has been shaped by early inconsistency, emotional attunement gaps, or rejection sensitivity, it makes sense that your brain might latch on to intrusive thoughts about:

Whether you upset someone
If you were “too much”
If your motives were pure enough
What a past interaction really meant

In this episode, I’ll walk you through:

How OCD hijacks your brain’s natural meaning-making system
Why high-functioning women with anxious or disorganized attachment often go undiagnosed
The difference between emotional processing vs compulsive rumination
What mental compulsions sound like (spoiler: they’re often praised as "self-awareness" or "empathy")
The science-backed treatment approaches that actually work: including ERP and compassion-based strategies

Plus, I’ll guide you through a closing reflection to help you practice sitting with uncertainty, the thing OCD tells you is unsafe, but your body needs to slowly learn to trust.

If this episode resonates, I hope it helps you feel seen. I created Hidden in Plain Sight for people like you. For those who’ve always cared deeply, thought too much, and tried too hard… without realizing how much of that effort was rooted in survival, not self.

You don’t need to keep earning your safety. You’re allowed to rest, to trust yourself, and to feel uncertain without needing to fix it.

I’m so glad you’re here.

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With warmth,

Dr. Lauren Schaefer